A website purely dedicated to ‘the science of women’s pleasure’, OMGYes has been revolutionising the online face of the female orgasm. Its launch has seen widespread support from online communities to celebrities like Emma Watson. So why does this website feel so radical? Sex and Love editor Bryony Armstrong discusses what it is about frank discussion of the female orgasm that makes the website both wonderful and surprising.
Every heterosexual sex scene you have ever seen - on TV, in a movie, on a porn website - will have ended in male ejaculation. Because according to every sexual media platform we’re exposed to, that’s how sex is supposed to end. That’s because a male orgasm is the ultimate goal, right?
Finally, we have a website saying no: wrong.
Passed down from the concept of sexual intercourse as a purely reproductive activity, male ejaculation has traditionally been viewed as the end purpose for sex. Female pleasure is largely irrelevant in the process of an egg being fertilised by sperm. The irrelevancy of female sexual pleasure has, therefore, been internalised for generations in every traditional sexual scene ever made. Of course, caricatured sounds of female moaning are nearly always incorporated, but generally this is created from a ‘male gaze’ perspective, becoming part of the paraphernalia of what drives intercourse towards a male orgasm.
So what has OMGYes done to turn this around? The website features both videos and articles exploring 12 different techniques for best achieving a female orgasm. The videos are often frank discussions of women explaining what feels good for them and why, and demonstrations. The information comes from research done with over 2,000 women ages 18-95, finally acknowledging the role the clitoris plays in their sexual activity. It’s awesome; and, to the conditioned Hollywood movie watcher, extremely weird.
Sex is not something that women are generally made to feel comfortable talking about. I don’t mean funny discussions with friends about who they slept with last night, but actual discussions about what feels good and what they like. As someone who went to boarding school, I heard hundreds of conversations in the evening between guys discussing what positions felt great and whether or not balls really play much of a part in their orgasms. (Once, awkwardly, even my boyfriend of the time was discussing this with the ‘lads’ while I was sat next to them all). On the other hand, I can probably count on one hand the number of times I’ve heard a girl say, ‘hey, you know what’s actually really great for my clitoris?’.
The reason OMGYes feels so radical, then, is because we suddenly have an entire website featuring only women talking about what works for them. It’s almost as though (shockingly) this is actually the most important thing to them during sex. Whether or not a man has an orgasm plays little to no part in it. In an interview posted online, Emma Watson muses that ‘it’s a pretty cool website’ with an expensive subscription that’s ‘…worth it’. Finding out that our childhood Hermione has a sexual nature beyond pleasing her partner came as a surprise. It’s possible, then, that women are actually allowed to enjoy sex so openly like this, whilst retaining their own personalities and not being labelled a slut? OMGYes says YES.
Our eyes have been opened to the fact that cis women have a clitoris. I don’t study biology, but I’m pretty sure it doesn’t help that much with reproduction.
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