“Home had a mixture of accents and hands and sounds that I will always carry with me but never return to.”Read More
This felt worse than simple exclusion; to me, it was significant that I wasn’t just being left out, I was being left behind.Read More
Keep fighting for what makes you a better, happier, more positive person, even when everyone can’t understand you yet.Read More
I want to get real about mental illness.Read More
Andrew McNeil explore what it means to be a man in today’s society, and how our identity is shaped by the context we grow up in. Is a binary gender system really more influential on our behaviour that our class or the way we’re educated. Andrew explores the ways his views have changed over the years and offers us an insight about what’s really important to understand about our identities and how we exist as part of a community.Read More
The thought of strangers listening to my music with the power to construct their own versions of my identity.Read More
Journalism need not aim for impartiality to be engaging; in some cases, journalists can even do away with a truthful account of events to attract readers.Read More
The importance of final year makes its presence felt.Read More
My whole world lived inside a pocket-sized cellphone, clutched tightly in my left hand, the limb closest to my heart.Read More
As the first coming-out movie deliberately aiming for straight appeal and blockbuster success it marks a milestone for queer dramaRead More
Daniel Gospodinov discusses the importance of artistic self-expression for those involved in scientific or mathematical fields, and explains how modelling for Label allowed him to express himself in a different, more emotional way.Read More
When will you be happy? When you get your dream job? When you reach your goal weight? When you get married? When you have a certain amount of money in your bank account?Read More
Teenagers have started to become much more involved and outspoken about current global affairs, and it’s fantastic. They are the future of not only our countries, but of the world as well. They are the ones who will have to grow up and live under the laws our leaders put in place and execute, so why shouldn’t they make their voices heard?Read More
Anyone can find their way to self-love by making the choice to start practicing.Read More
Here are ten top tips on how to get a good night’s sleep, and feel well rested the next day.Read More
I was boxed in by fear: sex is everywhere and completely unavoidable.Read More
Clothing is something that many of us use as a form of self expression- but can it also harm our confidence? When the label in our clothes dictates our size, and in turn our worth, then clothing can become something to be ashamed of. Christine Reppa is changing all that! She is the founder of Noya, activewear made for women by women, and taking the first step in removing labels by size from our clothing.Read More
This is the information that I wish I had known when I became ill but don’t hear in any mainstream discourse.Read More
Society and our culture has conditioned a false image of perfection, rather than a celebration of how unique and different each one of us are.Read More
Ena Starmer-Jones talks about the drive towards perfection so many of us feel; not just in terms of our appearance but in every aspect of our lives. With New Years fast approaching and resolutions already being made, this is also a good moment to reflect on what we are asking of ourselves and why we are asking it. Is being a perfectionist always healthy, and are there other ways we could frame self improvement?
Every time some kind of transition presents itself to me, I feel an urge not to let it pass without achieving some form of transformation. During my first semester abroad in Russia, picking cat hairs out of my food whilst negotiating with my host about her ban on me using the shower (a negotiation that was unfortunately unsuccessful) , I clung onto the fact that, once back in the UK, I would ‘sort my life out’. I would meditate daily; I would write hard about what mattered to me; I would alter my diet and cut out refined sugar; I would become stronger, leaner, fitter, better at Russian.
It is unlikely to surprise anyone that, collectively, I have not been successful. And yet, somehow, a few of these things are in the process of being achieved: right now I sit here writing something non-compulsory and unrelated to academics- previously a rare occurrence, as it has always been easier for me to curl up with someone else’s world nestled between the pages of a novel, leaving me free from having to scrutinise my own.
Lately though, I’ve been becoming aware of just how compulsive my drive towards self-improvement actually is. It’s like my progress towards being ‘better’ is never enough: I’m still not healthy enough; I’m definitely not fit enough; I still panic over the smallest of inconsequentialities. It’s prompted me to question why I strive so hard towards this idea of myself that I can never quite step into.
Being a perfectionist is part of it, sure, but I’ve also realised how I have been unconsciously acting upon a belief shaped by remarks made to me when I was younger. You’re so ugly; your hair looks like witch’s hair; you look weird: at the time I flinched at these casual, stinging cuts; now, four years later, I can see just how deep and painful the wounds run. Each is edged with the certainty that love is conditional; tender with the conviction that if I want to be worthy of it, I must strive, strive, strive to become prettier, more confident and more successful, for at any given moment I am not worthy enough.
I am not trying to state that self-improvement has to be toxic. Personal growth is vital and beautiful. And yet right now, I’ve decided to try to let go of resolutions and goals and attempt to simply be, so that I can contemplate how this could be enough, and how I could be enough, even if I don’t quite identify with these two statements yet.
Sophia Bush once wrote in an Instagram caption: “You are allowed to be both a masterpiece and a work in progress, simultaneously”, and when I read this, I feel hopeful. So many of us scrutinise our shortcomings to an absurd degree, but I hope we can also learn to cultivate an awareness and appreciation for our true, intrinsic value.